Stress + Six Weeks + One Book + One Fire = Gifts of Perspective

Sep 8th, 2011 | By Darlene MacAuley | Category: Inspiring New Tip, Life Balance, Sacred Life Coaching

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It’s been about six weeks of inaction for me on basically all things business, but in that time I’ve grown so much. It’s amazing how perspective can change, not only in six weeks, but also in an instant.

A Book

About six weeks ago, Micky Jones’ book, “Keep the Fires Burning – Conquering stress and burnout as a Mother-Baby Professional”, made its way into my hands, and quickly, her words made their way into my heart.

Stress is an interesting creature. It can burn you up slowly, over years and years, or it can strike you in an instant.

In my case, stress has burned through me at a slow pace for a number of years. I’m a huge advocate and practitioner of self-care, and I have a number of practices in my toolkit. However, physical exercise was not a tool I actively used.

In the book, one subtitle changed everything for me – “Move Your Body – Sweat is Your Body Crying Happy Tears!”

I don’t know what it was about that statement that moved me, but it was the missing link in my self-care circle that could help me get back on track. Within a couple of days of reading this book, I signed up for a family membership at our local YMCA. I’ve worked out almost daily for the last five weeks, and am loving a variety of fitness classes, yoga and pilates. I’ve also become more conscientious of what I eat. In fact, I’ll admit I’m a bit obsessed with MyFitnessPal!

Of all the self-care I’ve done this year, taking 60-90 minutes each day to move my body has been the most healing activity I’ve done for myself. I visualize all the excess I’ve been holding in my body as the remnants of a past I no longer want or need, and it’s been lovely watching it melt away, slowly but surely. It’s been a form of closure, and with it has come a feeling of freedom.

I’ve been happier, more patient, and more present. I breathe more deeply, make better food choices, and sleep really well, too. Each week, my exercise classes are the Big Rocks I add to my schedule first, and my husband and I make it a point to do what it takes to help each other get in our exercise time.

A Fire

Over the Labor Day Weekend, wildfires began sprouting up in Central Texas. Almost a week later, one fire still continues to burn less than an hour away from Austin. Thousands of acres and almost 1400 homes have been destroyed to date.

Three nights ago, after watching the news and reading online articles about emergency preparations, my husband and I talked about what we would take if we had to evacuate. We agreed we wanted all the framed pictures in the house, my dad’s artwork and any special art pieces, our laptops, my folder of important papers, and some special items of the kids.

The very next day, as I was at my computer in my home office, I heard emergency vehicle sirens outside. When I looked out the window, I saw what I first thought were leaves falling in the front yard, and immediately realized they were actually ashes. Seeing a neighbor walking outside in her yard prompted me to grab my husband and go outside to the front of the property to figure out what was going on. An official-looking truck pulled up to tell us we had to evacuate because there was a fire in the park behind our neighbor’s home. A glance further down the road offered me a view of a large stream of water flowing from a fire truck into the park across the road. We then saw another fire truck pull into the cul de sac behind our property.

I ran to the neighbor’s house to let them know, and when I returned to my house my husband was already pulling all the pictures off the walls. I pulled out the folder of documents, gathered all the laptops and power cords for them and our phones. Trash bags of clothes for each of the children were packed. My husband filled a suitcase of our clothes and pulled most of what was in the closet out. Toiletries and medications were thrown into a bag.

Of the two of us, my husband becomes strangely calm and extremely clear-headed in times like these. He directed me around the house to grab my dad’s artwork and my supplements. All our son’s baseballs and trophies. We unfortunately scared our son a bit as we had to call him at school for his lock combination to grab his valuable silver coin collection. We grabbed my daughters cd player, ipod, her favorite blanket, a couple stuffed animals and one of her beloved book collections.

Two cars were packed up, and I drove to a friend’s house a few streets away. My husband stayed to help two of our neighbors save what we now call “Money (valuables that will fit in a car) and Memories”.

As it ended up, the fire was contained within a couple hours, and we were able to return home within another two hours. At first we thought about keeping the cars loaded in case the fire sparked up again. However, it became clear that was a bit impractical, so all our belongings were brought back inside. Through it all, only a glass from a picture frame was damaged. If our house was messy before, the inside currently looks like a tornado blew through it. It’s okay though. Our house is still intact. We have so much to be thankful for.

Perspective Shifts

I have a new appreciation for the few objects I truly love. I remember walking through the house one last time before I left, with a feeling of peace that, if the house burned to the ground, I had my husband, my kids, and the Memories of our lives in our cars. Nothing else in the house mattered and was replaceable.
We were very fortunate that we actually had time to gather precious objects. I realize that if we only had time to evacuate with the clothes on our backs, our children were safe at their schools that day, and in the end, the Memories would be sorely missed, but what we most valued were safe.
Having all my accounts accessible online makes paper backups largely unnecessary. The only papers I had with me included our passports, social security cards, birth and marriage certificates. Everything else is available online or via a quick phone call. Tax records are easily accessible through my CPA.
An online backup service like Carbonite is priceless. If something had happened to our computers, we would still have access to our data.
Having said that, I have a couple of new projects on my list – get a few more important papers added to that folder, and create a complete inventory of our belongings available for insurance purposes. Before we left the house my husband went room-by-room with a video recorder to record what we own. Yes, I know, not so smart that we didn’t already have an inventory, but so it is.
We could definitely live with much less than what we currently own and be just fine.
Having five weeks of extreme self care – daily exercise, a clean diet and a month off from anything business-related – contributed greatly to my ability to remain relatively calm in the face of crisis.
A period of dedicated self-care and the mind & heart-shifting effects of a very stressful situation has created space for me to re-think the direction of business and life.
Stress leads to change, for better or worse. To heal, we must use stress to our advantage. Learn what stress is trying to tell you. Is it keeping you safe? Is it urging you to rest your mind, move your body, rid yourself of all that no longer serves you, love more?
Being of service to others is another wonderful way to minimize stress and add to your self-care toolkit.
Firefighters aren’t just good looking… they are essential first responders and true heroes. They continue to do so much for our neighbors as they work to contain and extinguish the fires that are still raging just a short distance away.

And finally, hug your loved ones. A lot.

Your Turn

What gifts have you received from the stresses in your life? What is one thing you can do today to shift your mindset and your response to stress to achieve better health – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually?